My Son Got His Own Place – Why Do I Feel Sad? #DadChat

Posted on March 8, 2015 by Bruce Sallan

My older son just moved into his own place, with two roommates. I played no part in its choice or the details of when, how, and how much other than some minor consulting. And, I didn’t even visit his place until two weeks after he’d moved in. Much to my surprise, I felt confused feelings (melancholy) after the visit and I’ve been pondering the reasons since.

Given the incredible difficulty our young adult children are having securing good employment and paying for their lives, an adult child that gets his own place is obviously a good thing. Yes, to a small degree, I am still helping my son but he is now paying his own bills, managing his own money, and hanging onto his own job.

Kids On a Leash

Posted on September 25, 2011 by Bruce Sallan

Before you start getting upset at me, the title of this column is about much more than those kids we often see tethered to parent by a leash! Walking in a park the other day, my 14-year-old son pointed out a kid being controlled by just such a leash and thought it might make for a good column. Do you teach your children self-reliance?

My first reaction was that it was too limited a topic until we discussed it further and both realized the metaphor this physical image inspired. So, with full credit to my youngest son, I realized what a great topic this could be given the degree of helicoptering and tethering my generation of parents have employed!